Wishin' and hopin'...

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Well between the slow cooker and my roll of grease-proof paper, the puddings are now cooked, wrapped and ready to go.  While finishing off the last ones yesterday morning, I had put on the Heart Christmas station on my radio which went live this week.  Trilling along to A Spaceman Came Travelling, the husband chanced upon me, and said sternly, 'You can pack that in.  It's only bloody November'.  This is just what you need when you're up to your armpits in snowflake covered cellophane, red ribbon and dark rum, and reluctantly I turned it off.  He can be a bit 'Bah Humbug' on occasions, but like every single man who ever walked this planet, he has completely no idea of what is involved in preparing a family for Christmas.

My Christmas started in January.  By the end of that month, I had bought my Christmas cards in the sale, and squirreled them away in my office.  And there they will remain, until I finally succumb to getting my posh pen and address book out.  The only good side is that in theory, this year I can just sign them from me and the husband, rather than having to list copious amounts of children.  I wonder whether they realise that riding shotgun on family Christmas cards all stops when you move out?  Probably not. 

I also bought the kids' Christmas jumpers in January.  They get a new one every year, with the emphasis being on inappropriate/cheap/gaudy.  I have only got this wrong on one occasion, when the jumper I bought for son number one was worn on many days without Christmas in front of it.  Epic failure...

So the preparation starts early for us girls, doesn't it?  It's around this time every year that I start asking the kids for lists of things which they would like.  These requirements are passed around various relations, and the idea is that they then get what they want, rather than the first thing my 5'2" Mother can manage to reach on the rails.  

As you get older though, the list of what you need gets shorter.  However, the list of things which you really do want just seems to get longer.   Here's mine...

World peace (always a favourite of the husband's, and well worth space on my list)
Willpower (Unfortunately, 'I'm just a gal who can't say no'...)
A waistline (damn you Mother Nature and your menopausal curse)
Eyebrows (a lesson to the young - NEVER OVER PLUCK)
Eyes which do what they say on the tin (pass me my glasses for the small print)
Boobs (of any kind, please)
Jeans which fit all the time, and not just after you've had them on for a week
A housekeeper (if she can decorate and mow the lawn, then even better)
Rain to fall only between midnight and 4.00am

I think that covers it...


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