Ready or not....

A certain question seems to be rearing its ugly head around Binland...

As you know, the Christmas Party is on the horizon, and I was asked the following question yesterday morning while I was trying to squeeze some sort of colour out of my tea bag in the kitchen.  (When the 96,492 remaining tea bags are used up, I may suggest that we swap the brand we use).

Anyway, back to the question.  Here's how it went.

'What are you wearing to the Christmas Party?'

Now, as we all know, this is quite a dilemma. My colleagues for the most part are half my age and the majority of them are of the male variety. They are used to seeing me in my normal Binland garb of boots, leggings and tunic top, and I probably bear a striking resemblance to some of their mothers in my appearance.  But when you have a big night out, you want to make an impact, don't you?  You want your colleagues to see you as you really are, and not just as someone who likes to kick the copier once a week.

So what am I wearing?  Well I held back until the lovely lady who was asking me revealed that she was going full out in sparkles and glitter.  It would appear that the other three girlies going are all doing the same, and all of a sudden, my black trousers and floaty top seemed a tiny bit boring.  

'I'm wearing an off the shoulder number', I said, the words tumbling out my mouth before I even stopped to consider what this would mean on the night.  

Strapless bra (digging into my armpits, leaving red welts making me look like an extra out of an Adam And video)

Vacuum knickers (everything below the waist squeezed out over the top of the waistband like a tube of toothpaste without a lid, hence need for larger than normal strapless bra)

Vacuum tights in case vacuum knickers give up the ghost just after the starter

Polyfiller for face.  This is marketed under the guise of Blurring Cream, but I think we all know what it is really.

Fake tan - memo to self not to self apply, as streaking not attractive

Heels - always a sticking point for me as if my heels are too high, I can resemble a duck in wedges.  So the kittens will be brought out for their annual month of use before being put back into the wardrobe for another eleven months.

And if all else fails?

Well, there's always alcohol...


Comments

Popular posts from this blog

It's raining men...

Ain't no mountain high enough...

Diary...