Tuesday, 4 July 2017

Hair of the dog...

I have come to the conclusion that my most popular blogs are those which either involve having some kind of pain inflicted on me (blood donor, broken rib, hangover)  or ones which involve the dogs. As I seem to be ticking along quite nicely at the moment (hang on while I touch wood), I thought I'd write about the dogs today, as a very large question reared its ugly head yesterday.

While walking the boys before work yesterday, I was watching their fuzzy bottoms walking in tandem as we headed back towards home.  Apologies if my language takes a turn for the worse here, but however much I tried, I couldn't find a better word.  It was Reg's balls you see.  Compared to Percy's, Reg's are almost scalped, whereas Percy's have a good layer of grey fluff around them.

Now, the boys always have their hair cut at the same time, so I couldn't blame the incongruence on that, so I have come to an alternative solution.  I reckon that when they are being groomed, and the time comes for the delicate areas to have some attention, Percy simply stands on the table stoically, feeling slightly embarrassed while  the lovely groomer gently snips and shaves him, just desperate for the whole ordeal to be over so that he can come home for a read through the Telegraph, discussing the more important issues with me as he sips at a green tea.  

Reg, would be very different I think.  As the clippers approach him, I reckon he lifts one leg high, and then the other so that all areas can get attention (think pole dancer and you should be able to picture this).  As she gets round 'the back' if you know what I mean, I reckon he gives it an Austin Powers, 'Yeah, Baby, Yeah!' and wriggles up and down the clippers in gay abandon, probably reversing up to the poor groomers hand so that she and her clippers are trapped against the wall while Reg has a whale of a time.  Never mind a bikini wax, he goes for the full Brazilian.  

When he comes home he has a quick cigarette and immediately falls asleep without saying a word to me as to how his day has gone.

It's just a theory...


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