Wednesday, 28 September 2016

Lovely Rita...

Well I've had better days.....

Yesterday limped into action with me locking myself out of the house.  Eager to get to work early, I had grabbed my keys (or something which looked remarkably like them) and slammed the front door after me.  As the door shut with a very reassuring click, I glanced down at the keys in my hand.  They weren't mine, but one of the kids.  No problem, I thought, they'll have a door key on there somewhere.  Trawling through the various keys, and trying every one to see if it fitted Cinderella style, there were none which fitted my door. 

I then headed round the back to see if any of those doors were open.  Now on a normal day, at least one would be open, as the husband is very lackadaisical about security (this is because he is from the North).  Many a night has been spent with the garage doors wide open, and to date nothing has been pinched.  I put this down to the burglar's fear of the piles of valuable things (crap) which the husband and various returning children have piled up.  It's a death trap, and I have started leaving a note if I have to go out there, in case I don't get back alive.

So back to the door.  All the back doors were locked, and then I suddenly remembered the Key Safe.  This is a handy piece of kit which stores a spare key for times such as these. Having finally located the bloody thing (I had never used this until yesterday), I called the husband for the code.  The Key Safe was duly opened, revealing....nothing.  Obviously the person who had last benefitted from the key FORGOT TO PUT THE BLOODY THING BACK FOR THE NEXT PERSON WHO FOUND THEMSELVES IN THE S**T.  So the poor old husband had to come back from work and let me in. 

And my day got steadily worse after that. 

I had the dentist yesterday afternoon.  Parking up in my usual place, I headed over to the machine and put a pound coin in.  Well it didn't like that and words on the display read 'Please remove your money'.  OK, I thought, let's try another one.  It didn't like that one either, nor the third and fourth ones I tried.  Not wanting to be late for my lovely dentist (him with the sense of humour) I gave up, reassuring myself that as we don't have a traffic warden in my town, I'd be fine for half an hour.

So whereas earlier in the morning, there was nothing where there should have been something, this time, there was something where there should have been nothing.  Speaking to the lady whose house I was parked outside, it would appear that as from Monday my town does have a traffic warden. The proof was flapping on my windscreen in all its yellow glory.

Oh happy day...
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