Wednesday, 20 July 2016

It's oh so quiet...

So the heat continues.  

Mrs B-T, the mathematical genius with a penchant for a boxer (the four legged variety, not Frank Bruno), who keeps the husband's accounts in check, has been telling me about a cooling mat which her dog has for times such as these.  I am sad to say that I have already been on Amazon, to see whether there is one large enough for me.  The biggest one that is available would be for a Labrador-sized dog.  Even curled up with my nose touching my knees, I can't think that it will be big enough, so it's back to the drawing board I'm afraid.  I am also considering filling hot water bottles with ice cubes and sticking my pyjamas in the fridge.  Well, you have to try these things don't you?

The husband, ever keen to wake up dry in the morning, allowed me to have the electric fan on all night.  This was a revelation.  I woke up yesterday morning feeling refreshed after an uninterrupted night's sleep.  It was a different story for the husband though.  He likes to sleep in silence (very tricky at this time of the year when the birds are doing their rendition of the Eine Kleine Nachtmusik at 4.00am) so any noise is banned from the bedroom. 

Apparently he woke up several times thinking that we were being invaded (I'm thinking Apocalypse Now) as the fan swept across his sleeping face.  Consequently, he looked like I do most mornings...slightly shabby around the edges with a desperate need to repeat the whole night's sleep.   Not too sure if I will be allowed the fan again.  I sense a bedroom relocation might be on the cards...

But I have exciting news. There have been some developments after the 'My name's Tracy, and I've started the menopause' blog confessions.  Some lovely people want to interview me for a television programme they are doing.  I just hope that the day they switch the camera on is not one where I am resembling an over-ripe tomato and screaming like a fishwife (assuming I remember that they're coming of course).  I would imagine that there is only so much that they can do with make up and a strait jacket, and I'm not too sure whether this would make comfortable viewing for all those husbands watching. Mind you, it will give them a small taste of what lies ahead I suppose.  Forewarned is forearmed apparently (yes, armed with a small overnight bag and a passport if the husband's fears are anything to go by).

So the husband, who will also be interviewed about the pressures of living with a woman going through the menopause is under strict instructions to play nicely, and to be generous in his description of how life is panning out.

He'll be fine...it's amazing what a small vegetable knife held to the small of the back can achieve...
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