Tuesday, 3 May 2016

You're an embarrassment...

Words from a Bird.  Day 124

I have decided that Sunday's barbecue needs revisiting, if only for the glorious reason that we had two bits of beefcake brought round by daughter number 1.  This is one of the joys of having older children, the backdrop can sometimes be worth looking at.

Now the husband and I, whilst attaining the highest levels possible of parental embarrassment over the years (mainly because of the husband's dancing and my terrible jokes) seem to fall into the 'cool parent' category when our children discuss us with their friends.  I can only imagine that this is because we both rode motorbikes in a previous life and that we always have beer in the fridge. (Actually, we never have beer in the fridge unless the children are here...the two commodities seem to go hand in hand for some reason).

So going back to the beefcake adorning my newly mown lawn yesterday afternoon...  These are friends of daughter number 1, and they turned up with daughter number 1's friend, all looking rather shabby around the edges after a particularly heavy night.  One of them (no names, you all know the rules) seemed to have spent most of the hours leading up to his visit with his arms hugging the reassuring porcelain of a loo.  The way he spoke about it, it sounded like the beginning of a wonderful relationship...

As the afternoon wore on, the husband and I probed the two males quite intently.  It turned out that one was an estate agent (oh dear) and the other sold orthopaedic equipment.  I did try to look impressed and a little bit interested, but failed miserably.  Turns out he's not medically trained in any way, but knows his equipment inside and out, so is able to advise hospital theatres as and when required.

Now a couple of weeks ago, I read that there are some things which we are quite happy to pay substantial amounts of money for.  Laser eye surgery for example.  Would you want to have the surgery done by someone offering to do it for £5.00?  No you wouldn't.  Likewise, looking at this 'just out of short trousers' boy, I wouldn't want him advising on anything going anywhere near my body.  Fetch me someone older for goodness sake!  Someone who isn't in love with his toilet...

Now the estate agent was funny.  Extremely polite (Bone-Boy assured us that this was extremely out of character), and desperate for approval from the husband and me for some reason. He even over valued our house to earn some kudos (thinking about this, isn't that what estate agents always do?)  I am more astute that the husband in affairs of the heart, and I think he has an ulterior motive. 

Time will tell, and if time doesn't then daughter number 2 will.  She doesn't miss a trick...
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